Celebrating Exciting Pride Month As A Vibrant Out Pansexual Polyamorist

Hey! My name is Suz, pronouns she/her, pansexual, polyamorous, cisgender white female, and yet, I am not your typical chick. By that, I mean, I think more like a guy (male energy?), and am not interested in having mani-pedis, coloring my hair, going shopping, wearing makeup every day, or high heels for that matter. Today, I wish to share with you some of my thoughts as we celebrate Pride this month.  

Oppression is the problem

Pride is a month long celebration of each step taken in overcoming oppression. Further, we do not have equality or equity for ALL humans in this world, and, in short, they are greatly needed.two books on a blue background. The Code of the Extraordinary Mind, The Buddha and the Badass

LGBTQ+ folks are marginalized.  If we look at one of Vishen Lakhiani’s tests for Brules (bullshit rules), there is one that pertains to folks being marginalized. When something isn’t true for everyone, then it marginalizes the few. Therefore, if you value some while belittling others, it’s bullshit.

Sadly, society has put pressure on queer folks for generations, telling them they had to marry the opposite gender and have kids. Because of this, many queer folks have taken their own lives or ended up getting divorced, for the purpose of being true to themselves, even if that meant being in the closet, or only out to a handful of people.

With this in mind, let’s play a little game.

If you’re straight (heterosexual), put a finger down if you’ve ever experienced the following:

~ oppression for being straight 

~ beaten for being straight 

~ arrested for being straight

~ murdered for being straight 

~ lived in a state having laws where you can get fired for being straight

~ been turned down for a loan for being straight

~ had to fight for the freedom to marry the human you loved for being straight pewter mug lying on its side with the word Love inscribed on it

~ been turned down or not allowed, by law, to adopt kids for being straight

~ denied medical treatment for being straight 

~ kicked out of the house for being straight 

~ ostracized by: family, the church, your religion, parents, peers, coaches, coworkers, or local businesses for being straight 

How did you do? All your fingers still up? In truth, I thought so.

By the way, do you see a pattern here? 

Proposed legislature in many states is railroading Trans folks and to what end? How does this move us forward as a society?  

The suicide rate among LGBT teens is too high.  Did you know some queer teens are not safe and accepted in their own home? 

Why are parents choosing religion over their own child?

Not only can doctors refuse to treat patients who are LGBTQ+, especially trans folks, but also, what if your loved-one got Covid, and the doctor wouldn’t treat them ‘cause they’re trans?

Similarly, humans in the LGBT community are less likely to get medical help and often can’t afford to.  When it comes to gynecology, heterosexuality is the norm. Would it be okay if we stepped back a minute and chose to be more inclusive by NOT assuming the patient is cisgender and straight, but, in fact, could be queer? Surely, a doctor could take a moment and ask about the patients sexual orientation. Furthermore, it would be advantageous if businesses would update their forms and policies to reflect inclusivity. Finally, what about eliminating wording requiring the use of pronouns all together? Winning!

 Shunning something or someone, because they aren’t what you are used to, could mean missing out on some good times  ~ why do it? What if that person or event ends up filling you with positive vibes? Missing out on that would be unfortunate. Make the time to research and discover new things.  It’s great for your brain!

What if we embraced our differences and loved our uniqueness?

Does America’s puritanical slant on our laws and guidelines serve us well? On the flip-side, over-sexualizing bodies at every turn is another common trait. It’s quite an interesting paradox, isn’t it? Wouldn’t it be nice if we could be free to love and appreciate our bodies without stigma and degradation?       

Why are we so lacking in confidence and self esteem while, equally important, not feeling like we’re enough? The anger, blame, fears, guilt, and shame must be worked through and LET GO! How do we turn this around? Why not embrace what serves us? Acceptance. Inclusion. Love. Understanding.night scene of the sky with the words You must learn a new way to think before you can master a new way to be

What if things were seen to be neutral instead of negative?

We have this tendency to apply a didactic to things as being either good or bad. What if things were merely neutral? Neither good nor bad, My washing machine stopped working. That’s neither good nor bad. It just is. However, by staying present, we keep the fears at bay, shrug off any drama that might come up about the situation, and remain peaceful.   

Wouldn’t it be nice to come together, love one another, have one another’s backs, and do what is best for us as humans? Being divided is only going to make our quality of life worse, for everyone.  By coming together, united, doing what is in the best interest of the human race, only then will we flourish. There are many great teachers on TikTok who are getting it right when it comes to addressing LGBTQ+ youth. We could all take some lessons from them.

I wish for a world of Inclusivity, love, understanding, and kindness.

How would our world mirror humans having high self esteem and confidence?  What would life be like with humans who were happy, whole, and thriving; not mired down with responsibilities and stress? I wish for you to feel confidence, high self esteem, happiness, hope, and love; If you are straight, would it be okay if you walked a mile in our shoes? Get to know some queer folks.

You’ll see we’re a lot like you. 

In public buildings, it would be nice to see more single occupancy or, even better, gender neutral bathrooms. The puritanical views of this nation are not serving us well.   

Bodies are merely bodies; a vessel. Over sexualizing women’s bodies, specifically, and men to a lesser extent, detracts from our abilities, as humans, to appreciate the female form, especially au natural, which is really sad! Yes, I’m biased!  🙂  

Talk to LGBT folks. Get to know them. How does it feel to be marginalized and oppressed if you don’t normal feel this on the regular?

Pride is fun! 🎉two humans being close, one wearing a rainbow tie-dyed shirt with purple hair and glasses at a Pride event

It’s a party! 🥳 A celebration. 🎈 Pride is a place where I am free to be me, authentically, transparently, unabashedly me, for the day.  I get to be around like minded folks. During the event, queers get to let their hair down for a little while enjoying great music, junk food, and a variety of entertainment; a parade even. 

LGBTQ+ humans want to live, love, laugh, and share our lives with folks we love and cherish. We want to pay it forward so that the next generation has it better than we did!  

On the contrary, why does my loving another human being cause you to hate me, call me names, or put me down in order to make yourself feel good?

Put yourself in my shoes. 

For example, for this brief moment in time, you are attracted to a person; gender doesn’t matter. Society says you can’t love just anyone. You must love humans of a specific gender. That gender must be opposite of yours. What do you do? Next, there are only two genders, female and male. What if I don’t want to be one of those two genders? What if I want to embrace my masculine or feminine energy at any given time?

Society says I can only date and marry someone not of my gender.

Once married, my spouse and I are to buy a house and have kids. For a minute, think of someone who is the same gender as you that you find incredibly attractive. What if you could date this person? Moreover, have a life with this person? For example, pretend you’re out somewhere public holding hands while walking the city street. Do other people smile and acknowledge the two of you, or do they say something mean and nasty, trashing your quiet moment with this special person?woman in a yoga pose with the words because we are all equal meme in bisexual colors

After that, what if you are sitting at dinner and want to give them a quick kiss before the meal arrives? Can you do this without feeling self-conscious? Afterwards, what if you leave the restaurant and someone stops you. Consequently, you get beaten up for having a lovely date with a person of the same gender as you?

Imagine if they beat you so badly you have to go to the hospital. 

What if the doctor assigned to you decides that you are beneath them as a queer person and refuses to treat you? Hippocratic oath be damned! Meanwhile, another doctor has to step up to the plate. Let’s say it’s a life or death situation?  What if you die because the doctor wouldn’t treat you?  Who is going to call your parents and tell them you died because you got beat up, as a result of being on a date with someone of the same gender, and the doctor on duty refused to treat you?  

We are all humans.

All for one and one for all. We need to be looking out for one another, taking care of one another. Life’s too short. We need to have fun, enjoy our time on Mother Earth ~ live, love, laugh, share and make this world better.

Say no to hate. Above all, be conscious of the non-profits, businesses, and corporations you give money to. Furthermore, research where they donate their money, and how those institutes are using it. Are they trying to further divide us and continue the hate? Stand up for what you believe in.Nat and I with our hands forming a hear with NoH8 on our cheeks, duct tape across our mouths

In fact, instead of being afraid of what you don’t know, learn about it.

For instance, how about making a new friend in the LGBT community? Volunteer a few hours at your local LGBTQ+ Community Center, read, listen to podcasts (Life in the Treehouse Podcast, hint, hint 😆), and discover what life is like for queer humans. 

If humans are pack animals, and we live our best lives having a community (Johann Hari), and folks are doing the work, putting in the time to be happy and whole, does this mean those who aren’t will have a shorter lifespan? I’m curious by nature.  It’s in my design. 😆

In conclusion, let’s embrace the idea that not everyone is a cis (cisgender), het (heterosexual), white dude, and open the scope to asking about pronouns and how to address one another. I’ll start. What shall I call you? What are your pronouns? Will you share yours in the comments? 

Will you exist or THRIVE?

With love and hugs,

Suz

Leave your comment